From the mouths of politicians
Every night in cities across the country, thousands of Australians weigh up their sleeping options and make a choice.Option one: a warm, dry bed wrapped in crisp, clean sheets, door safely locked to keep danger at bay. Option two: a cold, hard slab of concrete with a filthy blanket or sheet of cardboard to stop the soaking rain, nothing to protect against the many dangers of the street.
Why would anyone possibly choose option two, some who have chosen option one wonder, and if they have chosen option two then they’re clearly not in need of our compassion or assistance. QED.
Archive for the ‘Politics’ category
Political brainfarts at ABC Unleashed
February 17th, 2010Article at ABC Unleashed
February 15th, 2010My first article at ABC Unleashed was published a week or so ago.
Kicking the political football
Before boarding a flight bound for Christmas Island last week, Senator Steve Fielding announced, in that uniquely self-righteous way of his, that it was time to stop using the issue of asylum seekers as a political football.Of course, from the moment that Fielding booked his ticket it was inevitable that he was going to use the issue of asylum seekers as a political football, and announcing his intentions to the media was nothing more than another giant, looping lollipop of a kick. And just like his open-minded study tour to the US to get across the issue of climate change, Steve will probably come back from the remote Australian territory next week with a laminated graph and a fierce, close-minded certainty that everyone must pay attention to him.
Party started
October 7th, 2009Bronwyn Bishop has shown up to Piers Akerman’s place with a slab of Tooheys 2.2 and a bottle of Crème De Menthe.
It’s not everyday, as Chairman of a Committee, you get an award like the one given to me in 2004 as Chairman of the House of Representatives Standing Committee on Legal and Constitutional Affairs.
The inscription reads – Whistleblowers Action Group (Qld) – Whistleblower Supporter of the Year 2004.
I was presented for the work we did in formally taking evidence and reporting on the infamous Heiner Affair.
Punch commenter “iansand” nails it:
Bronwyn Bishop, Piers Akerman and Alan Jones. That is all you need to know.
And commenter “hoofman” finishes it:
you are group of political partisans who are using the alleged victim of sexual abuse from20 years ago as a pawn in a failed political witch hunt. You are not seeking justice but political scalps. Your supporters are conspiracy theorists with a track record. That you are among them shows what a liability you are to the party … The Senate looked into this a couple of times and decided there was nothing in it.
Drink!
Because some things just deserve a wider audience
September 30th, 2009This morning a couple of off-topic comments lobbed into Pure Poison from another single-issue nutter who sees a giant media/political conspiracy wherever he looks. As usual we didn’t approve the comments but this only served to motivate this particular nutter. In no time at all he was threatening to expose us on Twitter as the evil conspirators we clearly are.
Crikey’s, in the tweet below, are fearful that knowledge will leak out about their cover-up of Editor Fagan’s cover-up of Hallam’s crimes.
After repeatedly failing to get any comments published, Don Ross emailed the Pure Poison authors.
Subject: Hello the Fulsome Foursome, A good tip to you personally but not to Crikey members in general. Cheers and good luck, Anon.
Crikey, you guys are not the sharpest arrows in a Fletcher’s quiver …
The email, CC’d to most of Australia’s major newspapers, contained a creative Photoshop of the Pure Poison logo.

So I replied to Don’s email.
UNSUBSCRIBE
But somehow Don took my smartarse reply to be genuine interest and emailed me back. (If only I’d ignored him like the other guys did.)
From: On 4/08/09 Fotheringham admitted Hallam falsified certificate under BCC instructions by BCC Arborist Mr Fletcher. Evidence for police investigation requires Bligh to respond on behalf of Beattie . [XXXX@optusnet.com.au]
To: $$ Scott Bridges of Crikey a blind leading the very dense [sdebridges@gmail.com], “Mark Day covers-up Wardill’s cover-up of crime.” [XXXX@ozemail.com.au]
CC: $$ Syvret hides Hallam’s extortion crime to prote [XXXX@qnp.newsltd.com.au],
“$$ Syvret sees no Hallam falsification.” [XXXX@thecouriermail.com.au],
XXXX@qnp.newsltd.com.au,
XXXX@qnp.newsltd.com.au,
$$ Sashka Koloff on behalf of Jo Puccini [mediawatch@your.abc.net.au],
XXXX@newsltd.com.au,
madonnaXXXX@bigpond.net.au,
Bill Conor was aware of falsified cerificate on 2 [XXXX@griffinhilditch.com],
$$ Fotheringham never denies his blatant falseho [XXXX@griffinhilditch.com],
$$ Fotheringham flopped after Anstey & Anskern hi [Danielle.Trezise@griffinhilditch.com],
“$$ Crikeys swear black & green they see nothing.” [XXXX@crikey.com.au]
Date: 30 September 2009 11:50
Subject: Hello Scott, Just a wee bit of spoon feeding to give you a head start on the journos North of the border. You have to laugh, journalists no more honest than lawyers. Take care, & good luck with the cover-ups. Don RossHello Scott Bridges, Crikey’s Team,
I sense in you I can get another Syvret-type character to commit hara kiri.
Just respond to this email honestly or as best you can.
Scott, two lawyers from South Australia & two arborists will go to jail for missing the extra SULE falsification shown below. Sure, it takes time, Scott, to achieve that result but if lawyers wander into an engineering field expect the unexpected.
Deborah Blythe of the CMC did not like to read my emails on 21/11/2006 but you are a “come in spinner” type of journalist I would like to come aboard.
Sir, why not write to me again and claim there is some way that the assertion in the red font above will not be proven true but see if your argument is fair & honest before you send it off.
Dozens of Syvret’s, Soorley’s, Williams’s and Houghton’s emails never achieved that standard.
Remember, Scott, when push comes to shove, journalists, politicians & lawyers, in my considerable experience, lose all ability to make intelligent observation because falsified government certificates are plain for all jurors and honest persons to see.
Ciao & I always welcome my getting another Syvret in tow,
Don Ross.
Wow. Just wow.
Couldn’t give a fucking shit
September 21st, 2009Kevin Rudd has previously called Glenn Milne the “Liberal Party journalist of choice” but after the weekend’s “explosive” revelations about Rudd’s “expletive-laden tirade” I can’t help wondering if Milne is the ALP’s journalist of choice as well. I mean, doesn’t it seem just a little too perfect that Rudd’s aggressive slapdown of backbenchers keen to hold onto allowances that the public overwhelmingly see as rorts was leaked? And leaked to a journalist that would trumpet the leak as loudly and widely as Milne?
The electorate couldn’t give a fucking shit about people (yes, politicians are people too) swearing and Rudd knows it. That’s why he’s always so smug when giving his non-apologies for “robust” language that seems suspiciously pre-planned. And as for Milne’s faux-shock at the presence of “three female MPs”, I would simply ask Milne how many delicate women were present when he drunkenly tried to rip Stephen Mayne’s face off?
QT tweeting redux
September 15th, 2009The other day, in response to Joe Hockey’s Braveheart-esque “they will never take my Twitter” declaration, I came out in favour (with a few conditions) of politicians tweeting from the chamber during Question Time. Of course, when avuncular Joe makes contributions to micro-blogging democracy like this one we can only shake our head in bewilderment:
julia gillard can be really nasty
But today Liberal Senator Helen Coonan joined the QT Twitter fray with this observation from the Senate floor:
The time to separate telstra was two decades ago. Step forward Kim beazley. Take a bow!
And thus the trend towards QT tweeting began (is two politicians a trend?) and a hypothetical situation occured to me that would likely cause me to reverse my support of QT tweeting.
Let’s just say that Wayne Swan is on his feet in the House of Reps droning on about economic this or that. Over the other side of the big table Joe Hockey is tweeting rebuttal of Wayne Swan’s argument. Back on the government front bench Julia Gillard has logged into her brand new Twitter account from her brand new iPhone and is rebutting Joe’s rebuttal using @replies. Joe and Julia commence a full-blown debate of the issue being addressed by Wayne Swan through official parliamentary channels, but through very unofficial social networking channels instead.
Not sure I’m comfortable with a scenario like this one, but open to hearing alternative views. What do you reckon?
QT tweeting
September 11th, 2009It’s no secret that I’m a fan of Twitter but I must admit that I was initially torn by shadow treasurer Joe Hockey’s much-publicised Question Time tweeting. Part of me thought that it’s an excellent way to strengthen our democracy by making politicians (well, one of them) more accessible to more people, but the other part of me thought that tweeting during Question Time would distract the Twitterer from his or her job. After some additional ponderment I decided that I am in favour of QT tweeting as long as it doesn’t impact on politicians’ jobs, and with my fingers crossed that Twittering politicians use the tool for proper bidirectional discussion with other Twitterers instead of basic transmission of partisan messages.
Social media expert* Jason Wilson, via the ABC**, has similar thoughts.
“There will be arguments about the dignity of the Parliament and all that, but I don’t necessarily think it is a bad thing,” he told ABC News Online.
“At least it shows us that he’s engaged, he’s keeping up with debate and he is wanting to share his impressions with the wider audience.
“There’s some aspects of [Twitter] that are pretty compelling and I think in those political situations, with journos and politicians using it, it’s actually enriching the public’s view and I welcome it.
“It’s getting people’s impressions of different events and, in the case of Mr Hockey, getting a politician’s-eye view of the parliamentary process.”
[...]
“There will be people, and probably his fellow politicians, arguing it’s the debasement of the parliamentary process and he really shouldn’t be doing it, but as far as I’m concerned I welcome that perspective on the political process.”
What do you think about pollies tweeting from the chambers of parliament, and of pollies tweeting generally?
* What is a “social media expert” and how do I become one?
** How much did Wilson pay ABC to run his quotes?
Some friendly advice
September 8th, 2009This morning at a doorstop interview Senator Steve Fielding spelled “fiscal” wrong before correcting himself and spelling it correctly. Everyone had a good laugh at Steve because — let’s face it — it was really funny, especially in the context of Steve’s attempt to petulantly prove a point. Steve then went on radio and suggested that everyone should leave him alone because he has a “learning difficulty” (that everyone is assuming is dyslexia.) Whatever the difficulty, Fielding still knew the correct spelling of “fiscal”, even if it took a couple of goes. But fair call: everyone should back off a bit because the laugh’s been had and now it seems like we’re laughing at Fielding’s misfortune.
I know that Senator Fielding reads my blog* so here’s some friendly advice for you, Steve: next time you fuck up in public, especially on something as trivial as spelling, just own up to the error and have a good-natured laugh at yourself along with everyone else. Whatever you do, don’t make a whingy plea for sympathy by revealing that you suffer from a “learning difficulty” because it just makes you look like a sook. If you follow my advice you might find that you build some goodwill with the media and electorate and enhance your character a bit.
UPDATE: * Sarcasm (not vacuous, but) for those who thought I was serious.
Compare and contrast
September 8th, 2009This is the highest level of law making in Australia and the laws that we pass at the federal level impact Australian people significantly and I take the job very, very seriously.
Steve Fielding engaging in serious policy debate:

Steve Fielding engaging in serious policy debate:




